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I bought you a postcard, thought it would be funny Would have sent a souvenir, they took all my money It's pretty warm down here but it ain't sunny And I'm having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here And I'm having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here I tried to call you, I tried to call you Long distance operators that only stall you Besides the damn rates are so high, they just appall you And I'm having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here I'm having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here Started out a nice vacation Left the station right on time Now it's turned to near frustration I'm just a prisoner in time Can't get a ticket to get me home, my dear They just don't have too many flights from twilight zone, dear So don't forget to feed my cats, Spot and Jerome, dear And I'm having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here Having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here Having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here Seeing all the sights here, I'm getting lonely I'd show you all the film I took if they would only Let me go home dear, sincerely I'm having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here Having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here Having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here Having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here Having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here Having a hell of a time, my dear Wish you were here