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My best friend Sarah went to Europe for the summer My brother got kicked out of school Aw bummer! Julianne got laid in the back seat of a hummer And got arrested Like Mel Gibson I read In the trades That the NYSNC boy is No way! But I threw up in Paris Hilton's closet I got drunk and totally lost it When i woke up, the first thing that I thought of was Oh my, Kesha Those hot Jimmy Chus! Hey Paris, did I lose it on that pair too? Celebutons work in the glamarazzi Shoulda told my story to the tabloids, took the money Takes alot to get kicked out of these parties And almost get arrested Like Mel Gibson I don't Recall it all But i got like fifty phone calls Oh my god is it true?! I threw up in Paris Hilton's closet I got drunk and totally lost it When i woke up, the first thing that I thought of was Oh no Kesha! Those hot Gucci shoes! Hey paris, did i lose it on that pair too? Oh Of all the stupid things I've done I'm the proudest of this one But this one's the best! I threw up in Paris Hilton's closet I got drunk and totally lost it When i woke up, the first thing that I thought of was Oh my Kesha Those hot Jimmy Chus! And those Manolos and Pradas and Chloes and your sparkly dresses Hey Paris! I saw the saaaame stuff at Target Hey Paris, whatcha gonna do? Watcha gonna do, watcha gonna do? (Come on Paris!) I totally lost it, la la la (You're not foolin' me anymore!) All over your closet, la la la (I saw the tag! I saw the tag!) Paris Hilton's closet! I threw up in Paris Hilton's closet I got drunk(So drunk!)and totally lost it When I threw up in Paris Hilton's closet (Really?!) I got drunk and totally lost it La la la Tra la la la la