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Well, the farmer prayed for a better year And the crops were good like the Lord did hear But his barn burned down with winter near The answer came in white and black In the farmer's almanac, it says 'If a man could have half his wishes he could double his trouble' A sweet old lady was eighty-four When her kinfolks came for a month or more Now from overwork she's on the other shore Much too late was y'all come back And it says in the farmer's almanac, it says 'Visitors and fish smell after three days' Our leader was a silver tongued man He deceived the people of the land And when he got caught he couldn't stand It's a little off-beat and a little off-track But it says in the farmer's almanac, it says 'In rivers and bad government the lightest things flow to the top' Rod said, "I don't believe in God" Rod died and lies beneath the sod For God did not believe in Rod Life is a troubled and a weary track But it says in the farmer's almanac, it says 'Feed your faith and your doubts will starve to death' The little boy followed the honeybee And it flew straight to the honey tree He got stung but got the honey free Consolation for the things you lack Is in the farmer's almanac, it says 'God gives us the darkness so we can see the stars' He came home three hours late from work Said, "I had a flat and fell in the dirt" She said, "You gotten lipstick on your shirt" Well it turned out like Jill and Jack And it says in the farmer's almanac, it says 'Lies have to be covered up, truth can run around naked' He said, "Honey, you know I'm true I just look at other women that's all I do" Then she caught him with her best friend Peggy Sue Sometimes some women will look back And it says in the farmer's almanac, it says 'There's a lot of difference in window shoppin' and shop liftin'' I sat down at a shoeshine stand I had a real slow shoeshine man I said you don't pop that rag like some of 'em can He looked at me and then he sat right back It says in the farmer's almanac, it says 'The trouble with the world today is There's too much poppin' and not enough shinin''